I just got hit on at Walmart by some creepy dude with a rape-stache. Fuccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccck
Over the summer I found my Comm Arts journal from 9th Grade. I threw most of the notes and shit away, but I kept a couple of interesting assignments, such as this one. I have no idea why I ended up writing this, but it gave me a chuckle when I stumbled upon it, so I just thought I would share. Ahem.
Darth Vader’s Eulogy
His tyranny reached all over a galaxy, far, far away. Clad in pure black machinery, Darth Vader was one of the most merciless, powerful, and just plain insane villains of all time.
They say that every so often one should stop and smell the roses, however, Darth Vader would be more likely to stop and strangle them. As he stalked the far reached of outer space, our vile mastermind never hesitated to crush those who defied him. Vader was the enemy of justice and good, he was the destroyer of the weak. If Darth Vader didn’t like you, you were dead.
Most rulers like to rule with an iron fist, Darth Vader took this metaphor literally. This half man, half machine tyrant was trained as an innocent child to wield “the force,” as psychic energy that can be used to do anything from lifting a pencil to ripping somebody if half. By using “the dark side of the force,” Darth Vader slaughtered many people, from his defiant henchmen, to his very own wife.
Darth Vader was straight up crazy. Dragged into a life of crime as a young man, Darth Vader slowly lost his sense of right and wrong, and in turn, lost the majority of his body as he battled with his loved ones. Darth’s struggle for power made him lose all that he held dear, his friends, his wife, his potential, and most importantly, his compassion.
Darth Vader led a life of evil and darkness. However, he wasn’t always a monster, he was once a sweet little kid named Skywalker. Little Skywalker led a hard life; at a young age he was taken from his family and sent to work as a slave. Despite his troubled youth, for a long time Skywalker was a strong and optimistic young man, who was privileged enough to train with the best, and act as a caring hero to many.
Darth Vader taught me that we aren’t born evil, sometimes one desire, such as the desire for power, can transform a hero into a monster right before our eyes. Rest in peace Darth Vader, the Chosen One, the troubled soul, the leader of an empire..
If you can’t remember someone’s name, just ask them how they spell it. This will not only allow you to decipher their name (most of the time), but it will also provide you with an intro into a nice conversation about how spelling is weird in general, or about the origin of your partner’s name, or it will just allow you to get to know that person better.
reblog and make a wish!
this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)
OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT’S BACK ON MY DASH.
THIS SHIT WORKS OKAY, I AM DEAD SERIOUS.
The last time I saw this on my dash, I didn’t think it would happen, so jokingly I wished I could go to a fun. concert.
AND GUESS WHAT, I WENT TO A FUCKING FUN. CONCERT.
THIS SHIT WORKS, TRY IT.
One word can influence a person’s decisions, and cause them to make an angsty comic, such as Daytime Werewolf Episode 9: Insults, the unintentional cliff-hanger conclusion to the comic.